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How To Keep And Maintain A Strong, Healthy And Happy Relationship

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How To Keep And Maintain A Strong, Healthy And Happy Relationship

Relationship is the way in which two or more people or groups regard and behave towards each other.

An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves physical or emotional intimacy. Although an intimate relationship is commonly a sexual relationship, it may also be a non-sexual relationship involving family, friends, or acquaintances.

Love is a very strong feeling of affection towards someone who you are romantically or sexually attracted to. Our love for each other has been increased by what we’ve been through together.

Love encompasses a range of strong and positive emotional and mental states, from the most sublime virtue or good habit, the deepest interpersonal affection and to the simplest pleasure.

It takes more than love to keep and maintain a strong, healthy and happy relationship.

We have been made to understand that relationship is difficult to keep and maintained, but is it true?

Truly, it sounds like donkey work.  Who wants to spend hours at the office only to come home to enter into another job?  Won’t it be more enjoyable to think of your relationship as a source of comfort, joy, fun, and pleasure?

Although love is the foundation of any happy romantic relationship, love is not enough. In order to have a healthy, strong, and happy relationship, both parties have to be willing to work on it.

Of course, it would.  Then, here are some basic tips if you feel that your relationship is stagnant, shaking or if the good times are becoming bad and uncomfortable, if quarreling is the main form of communication, or if you just feel that you need a tune-up.  And they might even be enjoyable.

You can also read an article on How Communication Works Effectively in the Workplace

Then, here are some important ways you will follow to keep your relationship strong, healthy and happy:

 Acceptance and Appreciation: Accepting and appreciating our spouse essential in our relationship, feeling loved and accepted. Too often we don’t give our spouse the appreciation that would make the relationship fulfilling. Acknowledging our gratitude and validating the efforts of one another cements good relationships.

Play Together: We all love to play, regardless of our age. Do the following: have fun together; do something ridiculous together; and just let go. In addition, the next time that your spouse says something that bothers you, try responding with a joke instead of getting defensive.

Physical Affection: studies show that physical affection has a myriad of benefits. It releases feel-good hormones, it reduces blood pressure, it helps to release stress, it improves mood, and it’s associated with higher relationship satisfaction.

Showing physical affection can be as easy as kissing, holding hands, hugging, giving a back scratch, or putting a hand around the other person’s shoulder.

Relationships Have Their Bad And Good Times: Just the way you can’t expect to be happy all the time, you should not expect your relationship to be good all the time.  When you make a long-term commitment to someone you have to be willing to ride the highs, as well as the lows, together.

Be Supportive: There are many ways to be supportive to your spouse, including the following:

  • Give emotional support: listen to them when they’re upset and need to talk.
  • Give compliments and praise.
  • Give them information that they might need.
  • Give them a hand when they need it. For example, doing their house chores when they have to put in extra hours at work.

Be Vulnerable: vulnerability holds the key to emotional intimacy. She adds that vulnerability is about being honest with how we feel, about our fears, about what we need, and asking for what we need. It’s allowing ourselves to be truly seen by our partner, warts and all.

Keep The Novelty Alive: One of the positive aspects of being in a relationship with someone for a long time is that you really get to know each other. The negative side of this is that the novelty wears off, and humans love novelty.

However, there’s a way to keep the novelty alive: constantly try new activities together. This creates the excitement and the uncertainty that comes from the unknown, even if you’re with someone whom you know as well as the back of your hand.

Give Your Spouse Space: we want closeness, but we also want space. The key is to find that sweet spot at which we feel the warmth that comes from being in a relationship, while at the same time allowing each other to have enough space so that neither one feels like they’re being pricked by the other’s spines (feelings of lost individuality, feeling crowded, and so on).

Be Positive: Couples resolve to focus on the positive side of your relationship. Happy couples should focus on what is going well in their relationship, rather than focusing on what is going wrong.

In addition, if you do need to call attention to a negative aspect, try to do it in a positive way. For example, if your partner is messy try telling them something like the following: “It makes me so happy to come home to a clean house. When things are messy I feel stressed. Let’s come up with a solution together.”

Set Goals: Be a team of two that’s striving to achieve a set of goals that you’ve set together and that are important to both of you.

By setting goals together you’ll be achieving all of the following:

  • You’ll make sure that you’re both moving in the same direction.
  • Your wins are their wins.
  • You can celebrate together each time you achieve a milestone.

Studies have shown that one of the most important components of happiness is striving to achieve goals that you consider to be meaningful. In turn, one of the components of a happy relationship is having a set of goals that you’re trying to achieve together.

Create Activities:  You can strengthen your relationship by creating activities just for the two of you. For example, every Saturday night can be date night. Another example can be having your coffee together every morning, or taking ten minutes to chat every night before going to bed or going out for jugging every morning.

Let Your Actions Speak: Perform little acts of kindness for your spouse that let them know you love them. Some ideas include the following:

  • Bring home take-out from his or her favorite Chinese restaurant.
  • Get up fifteen minutes before she does so that breakfast is ready when she walks into the kitchen.
  • When you’re out shopping get him or her a little surprise gift.

Fight Argument: It’s not disagreements that destroy relationships, but how you deal with them.

The following about fighting argument:

“Disagreements are going to occur. The question is, do you go into it with a spirit of looking for resolution or do you go into it with a spirit of getting even, vengeance, control? You’ll never win if you do that. If you make your relationship a competition, which means your spouse has to lose in order for you to win. It’s not a competition; it’s a partnership.”

Here are some tips for fighting argument:

  • Know what you’re trying to achieve.
  • Put boundaries around the discussion so that you don’t end up arguing about every negative thing that has ever happened in your relationship.
  • Avoid character assassination.
  • Practice active listening. Try paraphrasing to make sure that you understood what the other person said and ask for clarification if there’s something that you’re not clear about.
  • Set a time limit.
  • Be willing to compromise.
  • Reach an agreement on how you’re going to solve the issue.

 

Use The AAA Approach: when your significant other is upset over something you’ve done, you should apply the AAA approach.

This stands for: 

Apology

Affection

A promise of action

To elaborate:

  • Tell your partner that you’re sorry that you’ve hurt or disappointment them.
  • Offer a meaningful gesture of warmth, such as a hug or a kiss.
  • Pledge to take action that is meaningful to them.

Keep The Ratio 3:1: Over the course of a day we have a variety of positive and negative experiences. This is also true when it comes to our relationship with our significant other. Most people think that as long as the positive experiences outweigh the negative, everything is fine. However, this isn’t so. It’s the ratio of positive to negative that matters.

Research has shown that the magical ratio for a flourishing relationship is at or above 3:1. That is, you need to have three times more positive experiences with your partner than negative experiences in order to have a healthy relationship.

In Conclusion, Strong relationships don’t just happen. In order to have a flourishing relationship with your spouse, you have to do the work. Open, honest and safe communication is a fundamental part of a healthy relationship. The first step to building a relationship is making sure you both understand each other’s needs and expectations—being on the same page is very important. That means you have to talk to each other!  Use the tips above to begin strengthening your relationship right away. After all, a healthy relationship is an important component for living a great life.

Ask yourself these questions:

  1. What do I appreciate about my partner?  
  2. What first attracted me to my partner?  
  3. What do I treasure about our life together?

 

Focus on the positivity to make your relationship strong, healthy and happy.

 

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